Thank you for NO BED BUGS!!!
IAWL: Met and talked to E. from Mexico.
Verdict: Great, see above.
TWO: I noticed several things to say that popped into my head, but I kept them on my tongue rather than let them out. Then I realized they were good things to say, that I should have just said them. In the heat of the moment, I do not recollect these mnemonics. Everything goes to hell. For one thing, I found myself worrying about being smart, funny, confident, when really I should have been thinking of what I write on here every night:Trust instinct. Slade fused with Gateway and UJE. Also need to draw on these mnemonics if needed--the convo one, the throwaway one. Review day's goals in morning.
However, I need to at the same time embrace the person who came out at the banquet: sort of quiet, but has a dry, quiet, contemplative humor. Thoughtful yet humanistic, genuine yet playful. (The "code version of me")
TWO: I need to just talk to people. I hate that I objectify people and only want to talk to certain people. Why not everyone. Need to be much more active, less passive, in meeting people. Practice being Colonel Slade, Gateway, UJE. Practice imposing that feeling I had at J-house tonight, like I was actually a Slade like character. Remember: People love to be talked to! They want you to go up to them! And work on relationship with Self before working on relations with others.
Monday, March 12, 2012
3/9-3/11/12
Thank you for Rachel.
IAWL: wrote to Mia. Made a list of people in my life. Also made the UJE ring.
Verdict: good, I talked to Rachel over email, asked about her weekend. Told her about mine.
TWO: Today was the symposium. Socially: I noticed several things to say that popped into my head, but I kept them on my tongue rather than let them out. Then I realized they were good things to say, that I should have just said them. In the heat of the moment, I do not recollect these mnemonics. Everything goes to hell. For one thing, I found myself worrying about being smart, funny, confident, when really I should have been thinking of what I write on here every night: Trust instinct. Slade fused with Gateway and UJE. Also need to draw on these mnemonics if needed--the convo one, the throwaway one. Review day's goals in morning.
However, I need to at the same time embrace the person who came out at the banquet: sort of quiet, but has a dry, quiet, contemplative humor. Thoughtful yet humanistic, genuine yet playful.
TWO: I need to just talk to people. I hate that I objectify people and only want to talk to certain people. Why not everyone. Need to be much more active, less passive, in meeting people. Practice being Colonel Slade, Gateway, UJE. Practice imposing that feeling I had at J-house tonight, like I was actually a Slade like character.
IAWL: wrote to Mia. Made a list of people in my life. Also made the UJE ring.
Verdict: good, I talked to Rachel over email, asked about her weekend. Told her about mine.
TWO: Today was the symposium. Socially: I noticed several things to say that popped into my head, but I kept them on my tongue rather than let them out. Then I realized they were good things to say, that I should have just said them. In the heat of the moment, I do not recollect these mnemonics. Everything goes to hell. For one thing, I found myself worrying about being smart, funny, confident, when really I should have been thinking of what I write on here every night: Trust instinct. Slade fused with Gateway and UJE. Also need to draw on these mnemonics if needed--the convo one, the throwaway one. Review day's goals in morning.
However, I need to at the same time embrace the person who came out at the banquet: sort of quiet, but has a dry, quiet, contemplative humor. Thoughtful yet humanistic, genuine yet playful.
TWO: I need to just talk to people. I hate that I objectify people and only want to talk to certain people. Why not everyone. Need to be much more active, less passive, in meeting people. Practice being Colonel Slade, Gateway, UJE. Practice imposing that feeling I had at J-house tonight, like I was actually a Slade like character.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
3/7/12.
Thank you for Dad. Four years, dead and gone. March 7th. One of the few sacred things left.
IAWL: Wrote back to Uncle T.
Verdict: good. I remembered Dad.
TWO: I need to just talk to people. I hate that I objectify people and only want to talk to certain people. Why not everyone. Need to be much more active, less passive, in meeting people. Practice being Colonel Slade, Gateway, UJE. Practice imposing that feeling I had at J-house tonight, like I was actually a Slade like character.
IAWL: Wrote back to Uncle T.
Verdict: good. I remembered Dad.
TWO: I need to just talk to people. I hate that I objectify people and only want to talk to certain people. Why not everyone. Need to be much more active, less passive, in meeting people. Practice being Colonel Slade, Gateway, UJE. Practice imposing that feeling I had at J-house tonight, like I was actually a Slade like character.
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
3/6/12.
Thank you for hot dogs. I ate three hot dogs today.
IAWL: Asked A about her problems.
Verdict: good, I ate hot dogs with mustard. Drank a cold Shiner Seasonal at night.
TWO: damn, I need to just talk to people. I hate that I objectify people and only want to talk to certain people. Why not everyone. Need to be much more active, less passive, in meeting people. Practice being Colonel Slade, Gateway, UJE.
IAWL: Asked A about her problems.
Verdict: good, I ate hot dogs with mustard. Drank a cold Shiner Seasonal at night.
TWO: damn, I need to just talk to people. I hate that I objectify people and only want to talk to certain people. Why not everyone. Need to be much more active, less passive, in meeting people. Practice being Colonel Slade, Gateway, UJE.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
3/4/12.
Thank you for Dad. I still think of him every day.
IAWL: Last night I took R & G out to dinner.
Verdict: good, had a Yoohoo at the coffee shop.
TWO: Need to fuse Slade with Gateway with IAWL/UJE, practice loving this person, BEING this person, not just acting like this person at certain moments.
IAWL: Last night I took R & G out to dinner.
Verdict: good, had a Yoohoo at the coffee shop.
TWO: Need to fuse Slade with Gateway with IAWL/UJE, practice loving this person, BEING this person, not just acting like this person at certain moments.
Friday, March 2, 2012
3/2/12.
Thanking is a spiritual activity. Thank you for R and swimming.
IAWL: It is hard to "help" J, though I need to make a better effort at it. It is hard for her to accept "help" from someone you like, I suppose, and she tends to just milk any attention she gets into the bucket of victimization. I want to give her the serenity prayer.
Verdict: good, went in the hot tub with R.
TWO: This is not a show I'm putting on. I need to actually believe in the self, remember the definition of faith. Remember that Slade has all the code hero qualities. Need to fuse Slade with Gateway, practice loving being this person.
IAWL: It is hard to "help" J, though I need to make a better effort at it. It is hard for her to accept "help" from someone you like, I suppose, and she tends to just milk any attention she gets into the bucket of victimization. I want to give her the serenity prayer.
Verdict: good, went in the hot tub with R.
TWO: This is not a show I'm putting on. I need to actually believe in the self, remember the definition of faith. Remember that Slade has all the code hero qualities. Need to fuse Slade with Gateway, practice loving being this person.
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